Warning: I need to bring out my rage is this post.
So, I've just got home from Birmingham. Friday was nice, Saturday was nice. I noticed the (ex) boy, I'll refer to as 'A' was texting somebody an awful lot (he's really bad at texting people by the way). I was like 'who's that?'. Just a friend apparently. I noticed it was a girl, Rosie. I'm quite good at sensing these things. It was bothering me, but I though I was being a bit over sensitive seeing as we're no longer a couple. The way he acts around me is like we're still a couple, I was really thinking we would be getting back together. So when he fell asleep I turned Psycho and checked his phone. yes I know that's sooooo bad, but I just needed to know what was going on so I could stop making a fool out of myself. Some highlights of the texts between them included her mentioning he nipple piercing, arranging a little date in two weeks time(spending the night at his), something about 'well they'd look better on my bedroom floor', theres more but I just can't remember. I woke him up, had a go at him. Cried most of the night. Felt like I was going to vomit being next to him. Not being able to speak to him in the morning, yet I had so much to say. Then I flipped when she texted him. I told him I felt like such an idiot, the fact that he was arranging a date with her when I was with him. He almost referred to me as 'my girlfriend' twice on Saturday. We're not really 'just friends'. Then i logged on to facebook, it was still on his account, so I looked at her profile (I sound crazy) in her profile picture shes with a guy, and her page says 'In a relationship'. Then I flipped again and said how stupid he was for arranging to see her when shes got a boyfriend. She lives in North Hampton or something. Going to Birmingham to spent the weekend with him, when she already has a boyfriend. I'm so so so upset and angry I just have to let this all out. He cried quite alot. That made me feel like such a bitch. I said to him how would you feel if I went to another city to spent the weekend with some guy when I was still with you. Think of her boyfriend. Another thing that really pisses me off is that shes not very attractive, she has really awful teeth. I don't think much of my looks, but I'm better than her. In a way it made me fell better about myself, but on the other hand it's like 'you prefer her to me?'.
Essay over, I'm feeling so crappy and need to let it all out. I still want him stupidly.
I hope everyone enjoyed there weekend a little better, the first half was good, the second, not so good.